From Norfolk to Sussex and back…
Granny, Woody and Sal at Wretham
'I have lived in Norfolk all my life. It inspires me, the sea, the limitless skies, the mud and the burning sunsets and the freedom of a place where more than 50% of the neighbours are fish.'
- Raffaella Barker
My earliest memories, before the age of 5, are visiting my elderly grandparents at Kilverstone Hall, Norfolk, from our home, Abbotsley, near Huntingdon.
These memories are definitely triggered by looking at old photos, such as these (above) from family albums.
I also remember staying in Hove, Sussex with family friends. I cut Caroline’s hair which I then denied - feeling guilty still! I must have been 7 or 8 when this happened. I’m not sure if it was on this same trip that I suffered from conjunctivitis.
Dorothy & Eric Fullerton, a great aunt and her husband [to me ancient relatives at the time] also lived in Hove.
The most important thing about both Norfolk and Sussex for me are the people and places we spent time with, in and at…
People
My mother and one brother live in South Norfolk, the other brother lives close by in Suffolk. We have a step-sister who lives in North Norfolk and my sister lives in Surrey. She and I take turns staying with our mother; there is no formal arrangement - it depends on all of our diaries. Occasionally all 4 of us congregate at my mothers house for a meal, a lovely event that happened a few weekends ago (September 2023).
Over the years I have had a collection of friends in Norfolk who I met before going away to boarding school aged 9. I would spend time with them during school holidays, socialising with or without my parents, or later on after I’d left school.
I think I met Penny, who is a year older than me, through Pony Club. We went to the same 3 schools. Her mother suggested Knighton House School to my parents as ‘a nice place in the country’. This was near Blandford in Dorset and seemed way too far away from our home to me! We subsequently went to Cranborne Chase, Wiltshire and lastly a crammer just outside Cambridge. Penny and her husband moved back to Suffolk about 20 years ago, and whenever we meet up, by chance or pre-arranged, we often discuss these places and other students/friends.
My step-mother (my fathers second wife), step-brother and his wife live near Heathfield in Sussex.
Places
In some ways I consider both Norfolk and Sussex as home. My parents, myself and my brother Patch moved to Norfolk in 1956 when my father’s parents died. This was before the 2 B’s - Bridge & Ben - were born. Although I ‘left home’ in the early 1970s I thought of Kilverstone as home. Possibly because I travelled a lot.
In the 1980s Angus and I house hunted all over Southern England ending up moving to Cooks, our home in Sussex, close to Horsham where he was born.
“The Sussex lanes were very lovely in the autumn ... spendthrift gold and glory of the year-end ... earth scents and the sky winds and all the magic of the countryside which is ordained for the healing of the soul”
- Monica Baldwin
I now travel between Norfolk and Sussex frequently. To stay with my mother at her home in Norfolk where she and my step-father lived since 1971. Also for social occasions, such as the christenings of my many great nephews and nieces, Golden Weddings of friends & relatives, parties, meet ups with old friends as well as funerals.
Since the death of my step-father, Denis, in 2012 this has been anything between 2 and 6 weeks.
The drive takes about 2.5 hours to travel 137 odd miles mostly motorway or dual carriage. I usually enjoy the journey as I love driving, however recently it has taken longer, sometimes over 4 hours due to more traffic on the roads, train strikes, road works, accidents, Bank Holidays. I attempt to philosophically accept this!
I usually make the trip by car which means when I’m staying with my mother in Norfolk I can visit family and friends nearby or further afield, such as Cambridge. During the 2012 Olympics we had tickets to watch the Paralympics which is possibly why, on one occasion, I took the train to Thetford. This meant I could return via West London to go to the Stadium.
When my kids were little I would drive them to stay with my father & stepmother at Kilverstone. In 1972 they had set up a Wildlife Park specialising in South American animals. When they closed this in 1993 and moved to Rushlake Green, near Heathfield we would make day trips to visit them from our home.
Over the years we made frequent visits to stay with my mother & stepfather at Wretham also near Thetford. We often went to North Norfolk, another 1.5 Hours away, which were favourite haunts of their’s. More recently I’ve driven my daughter Sal and grand-daughter Molly to visit Great Granny. My son and his family come down from London by train to visit her.
I usually arrive at my mothers with flowers and home cooked food, both sweet and savoury. Sometimes I cook cakes from ‘Norfolk’s Own Cookbook, Everything stops for Tea’. A friend of my mother’s helped collate recipes for this very successful publication to raise funds for the Marie Curie Charity. We reminisce about past times when we were a family, and/or on holiday, sometimes inspired by meals from my/our childhood - spaghetti bolognese, trifle, meringues…
If there is a party in the offing - such as my mothers 90th in 2018 or my step-sister’s Golden Wedding Party held in North Norfolk this August (2023), I’ll pack a selection of outfits.
It’s a family affair - Mums 90th Birthday July 2018
In addition I bring art stuff, walking boots, books, and sewing or knitting materials. Sometimes I bring memorabilia that I’m clearing out that I think my mother or brothers might want.
I often think about each location when I am in the other, especially if it is related to my own children & family or my birth family. If I notice exhibitions I’m interested in via newspapers or on Instagram I might plan my visit around them. Such as to Kettle’s Yard in Cambridge or the University of East Anglia. I based some paintings on a trip to the later in 2009.
While in Norfolk I find myself looking longingly at Sussex based exhibitions, such as Sussex Landscape at Pallant House, which we visited this January (2023), and Lee Miller photographs at Newlands Gallery in Petworth. Also anything at The Towner, Hastings Contemporary and Charleston Farmhouse will attract my attention. I am now looking forward to visiting the new Charleston exhibition space in Lewes to see the exhibition ‘Bring no Clothes’.
Being ‘on the road’ opens up my creative thoughts similar to taking a solitary walk - the rhythm gets my creative juices going. Driving north I’m drawn to a particular field, the cultivated plough lines & ensuing vegetation, all of which I find intriguing.
In 2018 I took my Danish school-friend to Norfolk for a trip down memory lane. Until quite recently her cousins lived close to my mother. On the journey I asked her to take a photo of the field. Stuck in a traffic jam last weekend (September 2023) I thought I could do the same but it didn’t work out.
Art
“I am seeking. I am striving, I am in it with all my heart”
- Vincent Van Gough
I make art at home in my studio and out walking and I also make art at my mothers. When at my mothers I restrict myself to the art materials I bring with me, which is sometimes better for my creativity.
While mucking about in the garden with my grandsons in June 2021 I became aware of a group of ancient Holly trees, which I’d passed without a thought for many years. We were sliding down the path on the hill between them. This lead to my sketching the trees and, lo and behold, when I visited my mother a few days later I came across a grove of similarly ancient Holly’s. They had the same distinctive bumps and ‘eyes’ on their trunks, however in addition they were adorned with engraved lines, initials, letters, heart motifs and what looked like dates. Since then I have been sketching, comparing, photographing and discussing these 2 groves. Although trees featured heavily in some of my Women Reading series these holly trees are yet to materialise in my work. In my current work I am incorporating the pair of huge Yew trees outside my studio window, or will the Holly’s win I wonder!
This blog post came about because a Danish friend, who lives near Petworth, and I often discuss how lucky we are to have access to both places. My mother lives in the very south of Norfolk so I don’t know a lot about the rest of the county. In fact I worked at her Wine Bar in Norwich in the mid ‘70s thinking I would get to know Norfolk better - no chance we were way too busy!
Note: 20.09.23
